lost

I was thinking of trying to write again but I’m not exactly sure what to talk about. I had so much I wanted to get off of my chest because I don’t really have anyone to talk to. So much to say and I don’t know where to begin….

feeling confused

So, I’ve been quite busy doing the myspace thing and making friends. I play mobsters, a lot. I’ve met some wonderful people on there. They’ve become like a family to me. They’re a wonderful group of people and individials.

There’s especially one person whom I have become quite fond of. He means a lot to me. He’s been away from home a lot the last couple of weeks, working. He is on the computer at night and we talk more than we used to. We’ve finally admitted to each other that we care more than we should and think about each other a lot. There’s a problem, though. He’s married. He’s lives all the way across the US so there isn’t a chance we will meet. Not to mention, he’s never seen what I really look like. Yet, I can’t stop thinking about him. I kind of feel guilty because he is married but it’s not like we are telling each other we love each other or talking on the phone. Just using YIM.

At times, I get sad because we can never be together but then I know it’s for the best. He’s told me that if he wasn’t married he would hop on a plane to see me and that kind of scares me. He’s apologized for “laying” something on me like that. I am so damn confused at times, though. I want to continue talking to him but then I think that maybe I should stop. But, when I think of stopping, I want to cry because I can’t imagine not talking to him. He’s a wonderful man with a wonderful heart and I would never want to hurt him.

I guess writing this out has helped me a little but it’s also made me sad.

Tomorrow, the boy and I are going to my sister’s. I think that is for the best so I can’t be online and be tempted to talk to him.

It’s been a while

I didn’t realize how long it had been since I blogged. I’m bored with bloggin. I’ll be back sometimes. Just not sure when yet. Drop me a email if like.

Disgusted with myself

Heavens help me, but I am addicted to Mafia Wars and Vampires on MySpace. UGH!  *cry*

I guess things could be worse.

I’m never good with titles

I’ve been meaning to write. I really have. I’ve haven’t been playing Neopets very much. I have over 6 millions neopoints now. I am not really bored with it. I’ve just been playing the Apps on Myspace as myself and not as my Jolie persona. What you didn’t know it was a persona? Poor you. Anywho. I am kicking but on Mafia Wars. I still haven’t reinstalled The Sims 2 on this computer so I haven’t played that.

I’ve been reading also. I got 3 more books on Tuesday and by Wednesday afternoon, I had the 1st one finished and started another. They are all by Brenda Joyce. I’ve been reading her de Warenne dynasty series and have yet to read The Stolen Bride so I didn’t read them all in order. It always seems to be out when I try to get it. I am going to read her Masters of Time series next.

I’ve been taking photos of my flowers and whatever else. I need to get out to the country so this weekend, I think we will attempt it, even though I can’t really afford the gas to go. I need to also take my old computer to my sister. I think the power supply decided to die in it. I am not good with the internal repairs but she is. And I need to visit with my mom.

I’m trying to save you from me

I know that I said that I would post at least once a week but I haven’t felt like sharing what is going on. Nothing bad just don’t feel like saying anything.

But here’s some good news:

Two of my lilys have bloomed!!!!

Seductive Smells by AB for the Boyfriend

Here’s something that will make you go, “Hmmmm”.

A couple of weeks ago, the BF was at Walmart with his brother and calls me up. He asked me what was the name of the Antonio Banderas cologne that I wanted him to get. I told him the one called “Antonio”. It was actually his own idea at Christmas time when he saw all the commmercials for Antonio’s “Blue Seduction” for men on TV. But, I agreed whole heartedly. I would have been a fool not to. Needless to say, but I was glad and very, very, very surprised. It was on clearance for $13.50.

“Antonio” and “Blue Seduction” both smell wonderful. Which brings me to the reason for this post. Friday night, I went to Rite Aid and saw that they have both colognes packaged together for only 21.50. I would have bought it, if I had the extra money. I would love to smell both on the BF but not at once, of course.

Antonio was in New York on July 10 to launch his “Blue Seduction” cologne for women. If it smells half as good as the men’s, I will definitely be buying it. I don’t wear a lot of perfume so when I find a fragrance that I like it’s quite significant for me. Right now, my favorite fragrance to wear is “Goddess” from Avon.